Obituaries

How to Write an Obituary: A Plain-English Guide (With Examples)

A plain-English guide to how to write an obituary, with examples, a step-by-step method, and how AI can help you draft one in minutes.

Mike H.

By

Founder & Editor

Published · 8 min read · AI-assisted research

AI-assisted content, see our editorial standards


Quick answer

Quick answer: Knowing how to write an obituary comes down to a simple routine. Gather the key facts first: full name, age, dates, place of residence, and surviving family. Then write a short life story, list the funeral details, and close with where to send donations. Most obituaries run 200 to 500 words and take about 30 minutes once you have the facts in front of you.


You have just lost someone, and now there is a deadline. The funeral home needs the obituary today, or the newspaper has a cutoff, and you are staring at a blank page trying to sum up a whole life in a few paragraphs. It feels impossible, and it feels unfair that it has to be done so fast.

It is not impossible. An obituary is not a literary masterpiece, and nobody expects it to be. It is a short, structured announcement with a few warm sentences in the middle. Learning how to write an obituary is mostly learning the eight parts that go into one, and once you know them, the writing goes quickly. This guide walks you through each part, shows you real examples, and points you to a free tool that can produce a complete first draft from a handful of details.


What is an obituary, and what is it for?

An obituary is a public notice that someone has died. It does three jobs at once. It informs the community of the death, it announces when and where the services will be held, and it honors the person with a brief account of their life.

It is different from a eulogy. A eulogy is a spoken tribute delivered at the funeral, often several minutes long and personal in tone. An obituary is written, short, and factual, and it is published, in a newspaper, on a funeral home website, or both. You may need both, and our guide to writing a eulogy covers the spoken side.

Knowing the purpose helps you write it. You are not trying to capture everything. You are giving readers the facts they need and a sense of who this person was.


What to include: the 8 essential parts

Nearly every obituary contains the same eight elements. Use this as your checklist.

1

Announcement of death

the person's full name, age, city, and the date they died. Many families add a gentle phrase such as "passed away peacefully" or "surrounded by family."

2

Biographical sketch

date and place of birth, parents' names, and a few defining facts: where they grew up, their education, their military service.

3

Life story

the heart of the obituary. Career, marriage, the things they loved, the way friends would describe them. This is two to four sentences, not a chapter.

4

Surviving family members

listed in a standard order: spouse, then children, then grandchildren, then siblings. Our guide to listing family in an obituary covers the exact order.

5

Family members who died before them

often introduced with "preceded in death by."

6

Service details

the date, time, and location of the visitation, funeral, or memorial. Include the address.

7

Memorial or donation information

where to send flowers, or a charity the family suggests "in lieu of flowers."

8

A closing line

an optional final sentence, a favorite saying, a line of scripture, or a simple "She will be deeply missed."

💡 Tip

Not every obituary needs all eight parts. A very short notice may include only the announcement, service details, and family. Use what fits the person and your budget, newspapers often charge by the line.


Step-by-step: writing one in 30 minutes

Here is the fastest reliable method. Do it in this order and the page fills itself.

1

Gather the facts first

before you write a word, write down every name, date, and place on a single sheet. Hunting for a birth date mid-sentence is what makes this take all afternoon.

2

Draft the opening line

start with the announcement: "[Full name], [age], of [city], passed away on [date]." This sentence is almost done before you begin.

3

Write the life story in the middle

three or four sentences. Think about what the person would want remembered, not a resume.

4

List the family

surviving members first, then those who preceded them. Keep the order consistent.

5

Add the service and donation details

copy these exactly from the funeral home; a wrong address causes real problems.

6

Read it out loud once

your ear catches errors your eye skips. Then have one other family member check the names.

Staring at a blank page? Let AI write the first draft

Our Letter Writer drafts professional letters with the right regulatory language, free, in seconds.

Try Letter Writer →

Examples you can start from

Here are two short, real-style obituaries. Use them as scaffolding, replace the details with your own.

A traditional obituary:

Margaret Ellen Carter, 84, of Dublin, Ohio, passed away peacefully on April 12, 2026, surrounded by her family. Margaret was born on June 3, 1941, in Columbus, the daughter of Harold and Ruth Bennett. She married James Carter in 1963 and they shared 58 years together. A devoted teacher for three decades, Margaret was happiest in her garden and never missed a grandchild's ball game. She is survived by her three children, David, Susan, and Thomas; seven grandchildren; and her sister, Joan. She was preceded in death by her husband, James. A memorial service will be held at 11 a.m. on April 19 at Hope Lutheran Church, 240 Maple Avenue, Dublin. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be made to the Dublin Public Library.

A short, simple obituary:

Robert "Bob" Lewis, 79, of Westerville, died on April 10, 2026. Bob was a Navy veteran, a lifelong fisherman, and a friend to everyone he met. He is survived by his wife, Carol, and two sons. A graveside service will be held privately. Memorial gifts may be sent to the local VFW post.

Notice how both follow the same skeleton. The first is fuller; the second is spare. Both are complete and dignified.


Common mistakes to avoid

A few errors show up again and again, and all of them are easy to prevent.

⚠ Important

The single most common mistake is a wrong date or misspelled name. These are permanent and public. Always have a second family member proofread before you submit.

Beyond that: do not try to list every job, hobby, and award, an obituary is a sketch, not a biography. Do not include a home address or full birth date if identity-theft is a concern in your family. And do not feel obligated to use somber, formal language if the person was warm and funny; the tone can match the life.


How AI can help you draft yours

If the blank page is the hard part, this is where a tool genuinely helps. You provide the facts, the names, dates, a few sentences about the person's life, and the AI arranges them into a complete, properly ordered draft in seconds. You then read it, change anything that does not sound right, and you are done.

This does not replace your judgment. The AI does not know your mother; you do. But it removes the staring-at-nothing problem and handles the structure, so your energy goes into the few sentences that actually matter.

Our Letter Writer is free during our feedback period and produces a draft you can download and edit. It is built for exactly this kind of difficult, deadline-driven writing.


Frequently asked questions

How long should an obituary be?

Most obituaries run between 200 and 500 words. Newspapers often charge by the line or word, so length is partly a budget decision. A funeral home website usually has no length limit, so you can publish a fuller version there and a shorter one in print.

What is the difference between an obituary and a death notice?

A death notice is a brief, paid announcement with just the essential facts: name, date of death, and service details. An obituary is longer and includes a life story. Some newspapers use the terms interchangeably, so ask what your paper means when they quote a price.

Who usually writes the obituary?

Most often a close family member, a spouse, adult child, or sibling. Funeral homes will sometimes write a basic version for you, and some families ask a friend who writes well. There is no rule; whoever is best placed to gather the facts and find the words should do it.

Do I have to publish an obituary in the newspaper?

No. Many families now publish only on the funeral home's website, which is free and reaches relatives and friends through shared links. A newspaper notice still helps reach an older local community who may not be online.

How quickly do I need to write it?

It depends on your deadlines. Newspapers usually need it a day or two before the funeral, and funeral homes post online versions quickly so people can plan to attend. Ask the funeral director for the exact cutoff so you are not rushed at the last minute.

Can I update or correct an obituary after it is published?

Online obituaries on funeral home sites can usually be corrected, just contact the funeral home. Printed newspaper obituaries cannot be changed once they run, which is why proofreading names and dates beforehand matters so much.


The bottom line

Writing an obituary feels overwhelming because of when you have to do it, not because the task itself is hard. Gather your facts, follow the eight-part structure, write three or four warm sentences in the middle, and check the names twice. That is the whole job.

If the blank page is stopping you, our Letter Writer will turn your facts into a complete first draft for free. When you are ready, browse the rest of our obituary writing guide for examples and templates for specific situations.

For more on protecting an older relative's affairs and finances after a loss, RetirementScamGuide.com has practical guidance on the steps that follow.


Related reading

Need help finding the words?

Our Letter Writer drafts obituaries, eulogies, and more, free.

Try Letter WriterAll Obituaries guides